How can I identify it in someone else?
The Bible says regarding sin, "Every one that doeth evil hateth the light, neither cometh to the light, lest his deeds should be reproved" (John 3:20). Someone engaging in sexual sin will try to keep his deeds hidden from the light. Here are some examples:
 | keeping his finances in the dark (refusing to keep track of income or spending, hiding money or checks in secret places, having a separate account or credit cards with no accountability or supervision, asking for loans for unspecified bills, demanding a high degree of accountability for the spending of others while keeping his own finances disorganized) |
| keeping his time in the dark (going into work early before his co-workers or frequently being the last one to leave, nearly always late for appointments, staying up late in front of the television or on the computer after the rest of the household has gone to bed, spending less time and showing less interest in non-sexual or same-sex relationships, spending more time away from family on vague projects with no accountability) |
| keeping his sinful relationships in the dark (receiving strange calls at unusual times or making secretive calls, feeling the need to minimize the importance of certain relationships when they are discovered, hiding pornography, hiding other e-mail or Internet access accounts, spending long amounts of time in purposeless talk in person or on-line with members of the opposite sex) |
| keeping his guilt in the dark (when confronted, he will deny the sin, minimize it, make vague promises to change, shift blame to the one confronting him, or verbally attack the one confronting him) |
| keeping his emotions in the dark (frequently on an emotional plateau, often mildly depressed for no apparent reason, unable to express or even identify one's own emotions, unable to show compassion) |
Of course, these factors do not prove in and of themselves that someone is engaging in sexual sin. They are indicators that sin is likely.
| What is God's command for our sexuality? |
| How do I question or confront my husband on his sexual sin? |
| How can I check the history file to know what my husband is viewing on the Internet? |
| How does Jesus Christ free us from the bondage of sexual sin? |
| How does sexual sin develop? |
| Is there any hope to overcome sexual sin? |
| What resources are available to help overcome sexual sin? |